Every Silver Lining Has a Dark Cloud

This week I’ve woken to three sunny mornings in a row – Spring is on the way! The UK’s winter has been a dull, wet and stormy affair. Almost inevitably, by late afternoon the rain has returned but the mornings have been glorious and have us smiling in anticipation of the day to come. So whether we want to present an optimistic face to the world, in spite of our circumstances, or we choose to dwell in a depressive state in spite of momentary relief, we alone are responsible for our happiness and the choices we make. There is nothing New Age about this way of thinking. As they say, ‘There’s nothing new under the sun’. Shakespeare said it simply – ‘Nothing is either good or bad but thinking makes it so.’ In the Christian tradition we have just entered the season of Lent in remembrance of the period of fasting and spiritual preparation that Jesus undertook before his death and resurrection. Everyone reading these words will respond to them in a different way; some with deep reverence, some with incredulity, still others with an open minded willingness to learn from a master who chose to be in the world but not of it. But anyone who has changed direction in life has experienced a period of adjustment, often painful, before settling on a new trajectory. 40 days is a typical time for the body to respond to challenge in a noticeable way, even though change has been happening slowly and consistently throughout. Coaching is about change. Insufficient challenge results in insufficient change and if there’s insufficient change, what’s the point of coaching? Sometimes my challenge will cause alienation, but it is my job to hold the mirror as steadily as I can so that clients can recognise that their predicament is their responsibility. Oftentimes they complain that the mirror is distorted and smashing it is always an option, (Can anyone really afford seven years of bad luck?) but the mirror is a tool which will show them what they cannot otherwise see. If they take stock of their situation and plot a course for the health they want, it’s usually achievable. Rethinking and adjusting their diet can seem a dull and stormy affair and surrendering addictions can be painful but when clients emerge from the storm of perceived deprivation, and can look back with 20:20 vision on the journey they’ve made, they know deep down that they would never go back. The Lent of my childhood has changed completely. It’s no longer about giving up sweets or not thumping my sister, but more about exploring how I can improve my overall health, Physically, Mentally and Spiritually. Calorie restriction or ‘Intermittent Fasting’ is a time honoured method of improving insulin sensitivity and so preventing the development of many chronic illnesses. Similarly, turning off the TV or Playstation in favour of a period of meditation and focussed attention on ‘what is’ will improve our mental resilience. Service to others is the surest way to grow spiritually and is available to everyone regardless of their circumstances. The job is never done. While we are breathing we are under development, but we come to realise, as Neale Donald Walsh tells us - ‘Taking better care of yourself is not merely a matter of good health, it is a measure of spiritual evolution.’ For now the dark clouds of yesterday have passed and there’s a silver lining to be enjoyed. I’ll enjoy it for a while before inviting someone else to hold up the mirror to me.